yellowsnowcone

Relocated

2008-05-01T04:50:00.002+08:00

http://clarencekoh.com/blog

Yes, updates will no longer stream through the yellowsnowcone.

Friends, Romans, Countrymen! Update your links!

Coming Soon!

2008-04-30T18:55:00.001+08:00

This blog, on a dedicated server, on a better engine.

Sorting.... (Time Remaining: 1000 years)

2008-04-28T15:01:00.002+08:00

I know having an extensive song collection gives me bragging rights.

But when you have to sort it. It becomes a real drag.

Reality Check

2008-04-27T02:22:00.003+08:00

24/04/08 - 1930H - Exam officially ends.
24/04/08 - 2030H - I'm at Holland Village (Wala's)

4 Jugs and 8 Pints Later...

That be Alvin, Guo Wei, Me and Matthew.

And YES, WHOOPDEEDOO! The freaking exams are finally over. The wait was excruciating. It was torturous. But who cares now?

Let there be more partying this 'summer' break.

Time Goes By, So Slowly.

2008-04-24T00:21:00.001+08:00

It will all be over.
In 19hours.

Cat-Induced Insomnia

2008-04-23T03:22:00.002+08:00

Cat pees on my bed.
Cat meets my wrath.
Cat leaves room.

All these when I was about to turn in for the night.

Now I'll have to wait till the machine is done with my sheets. Damnit!

The Final Yard... Just Around the Corner

2008-04-22T18:25:00.002+08:00

2 more days to liberation.
Lots more to study. Damnit.

After that, it's all fun and games.
It's just weird that every university exam feels like the GCE 'A' Levels.

So Damn Jaded

2008-04-21T01:13:00.002+08:00

Yes, this strikes you when you least expected.
You think the finishing line is near, but it ain't so.
It's times like this when you think that optimism is overrated.
Exams are real downers.
Don't get me started on the NTU system.
Seriously, fuck NTU.

Battle-in-Progress

2008-04-17T21:56:00.003+08:00

I can see the sunbeams peeking over the horizon.
A new dawn is near.
A half-adiós to the second semester.
One that flew by so freaking fast that I didn't know what slapped, punched and kicked me.
Half the nightmare is over; Half the battle won.

"Ready you swords! Gird your loins!"

2008-04-14T15:21:00.003+08:00

For the battle is close at hand.

Hold the fort and fight your demons.

The Twenthy-Fourth Day in the Month of April of the Two Thousand and Eighth Year of the Lord beckons.

The reprieve lies just beyond the horizon.

Mathematically Inclined

2008-04-13T17:13:00.004+08:00

I discovered the "silver lining" to the dark clouds above.

Half my exams are already over!

Remember the plethora of projects I was subjected to?

Apparently, they constitute a huge proportion of my final results.

Lets do some computations a proof!

Exam weightages for...

COM202: 50%
COM204: 30%
COM208: 50%
EE8084: 50%
MB101: 60%
HE192: 80%

Adding them up, you get 320% out of 600%.

Applying simple division, you get roughly... 53%

That means... 47% of my exams are over.

Does that make me any happier? NO!

Here's an ode to the exams:

Commercial and Political Interests Don't Mix?

2008-04-13T02:07:00.002+08:00

That's what the asshole world leaders are saying.

China has a human rights issue, let's overlook that an support their Olympics bid.

It's just as good as saying that an abusive father that provides for a family is fine.

What utter nonsense.

A boycott transcends interests.

It's greed that makes hypocrites out of everyone; It'd of course be a lost opportunity not to do business with China.

Diplomacy is a blend of cover-ups, backstabbing and hypocrisy.

So much for being advocates of freedom. Fuck off.

Shoot Me

2008-04-13T01:53:00.003+08:00

Think I've said this before, but the truth still stands...

Studying is a measure of how much you hate yourself.

Les Miserables

2008-04-11T23:21:00.005+08:00

I hate studying!
I hate studying!
I hate studying!
I hate studying!
I hate studying!
I hate studying!

If that was not resonating enough, I don't know what is.

Settled

2008-04-10T15:29:00.001+08:00

Ironing stuff out makes things better.
Put everything on the table so that others will know what's on your plate.
Human logic and reasonableness will prevail.

Unhappiness

2008-04-10T12:24:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wonder why I didn't go for a single room in hall.

Living with people from other backgrounds is definitely tough. I thought I learnt that in national service. But no. I chose to stick on with this roommate of mine and his idiosyncrasies.

From making me unable to sleep at night to stinking up the whole room by bringing in his meals. He has indeed made me feel uneasy. I still regret for not applying for a singly room.

I'm sure he feels pissed about some of my practices; like spraying air-fresheners and constantly wanting to keep the room clean.

I just hate that garlic-ky smell in the room. I just hate the dust that crawls on the ground. I just need the the lights to go out so that I can sleep.

Oh hell. In the event that he's unable to stay-on in hall, I'll go for a single room. No more putting up with nonsenses. Know what's the worst thing? These have all in one way or another affected my studies. There are of course many more stuff that I'm unhappy about.

Our Time is Running Out

2008-04-09T02:02:00.001+08:00

I think I'm drowning
Asphyxiated
I wanna break this spell
That you've created

You're something beautiful
A contradiction
I wanna play the game
I want the friction

You will be the death of me
You will be the death of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out

I wanted freedom
Bound and restricted
I tried to give you up
But I'm addicted

Now that you know I'm trapped sense of elation
You'd never dream of
Breaking this fixation

You will squeeze the life out of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out
How did it come to this?
Oh

You will suck the life out of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out
How did it come to this?
Oh

The Number Game

2008-04-07T22:13:00.003+08:00

8 Days to the Exams.
9 Days of Hell.
17 Days till Redemption.

A whole shitload of work to complete.

Mash that up and you get my life. I wake up every morning, worry about the exams then attempt to study but end up doing jack squat. Then, it's the evening, time to turn in. Damnit.

A Politically Unstable World: Thanks Everyone!

2008-04-07T01:25:00.005+08:00

This video has been blamed on inciting hate toward Islam. Well, many paradigms exists. As long as terrorists are around, you will have people like Geert who will cook up such stuff time and again.

I am not condoning this video. But this world is built like an accounting system where humans go eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. When will all these hatred end?

Seriously, whatever it is, it seems like there is still a stigma attached to Islam in today's world. Many attribute it to the much popularised terrorist attacks on western government and commercial installations. However, how often have people seen the attacks on helpless Iraqis or the brutal treatment on Palestinians.

Western nations should also consider if they have done anything to undermine the others. What's it with all that white superiority in the world? When the exploited don't speak, it does not mean that everything's fine. So now when the exploited speaks and pokes you for your attention, you attack back? Fancy the terms 'democracy' and 'freedom' so often preached. Freedom without responsibility is anarchy.

Anyway, if you have not watched, here's the hate-mongering video. However, I have to say again that hate begets hate, unless one party backs down, this is going to be a vicious cycle. Peace in today's context is no longer defined as the absence of war and strife; it's just a day spent without a terrorist attack. Whatever happened harmony?

Anti-You

2008-04-04T17:41:00.002+08:00

Just another instance that NTU just isn't for anyone or everyone. They screwed up my giro crediting account number. I don't remember them in being this inefficient in collecting payment. Now, when it's time to make payment, they can't do it properly?

The thing is, they sent me a computer-generated remittance advice notifying me that $28 will be credited to my bank account as a token sum for helping the school out. I checked the details and realised that my account number stated on the slip was wrong. Then, I called up the contact number stated. To my surprise, they say that a person by the name of "Yvonne" at another number will be able to settle this predicament for me. Then I called the number for "Yvonne" and the person who picked up said she's on leave. I asked for advice and was told to head to the Student Services Centre (which is up on a fucking hill i.e. out of the way) to block my bank account.

I cursed under my breath and took a walk up to that God-forsaken place. Upon enquiry at the counter there, I was told that they have no control over Giro accounts that I receive payments; only those they collect payment from. I was instructed to head to the main admin building to settle the matter. By then I was already raging. I duly made my way to the other branch of the "Office of Finance" (how many branches do they need anyway?). I was then told to produce my bank book(by an assertive-sounding staff) so that they can verify that "someone else" keyed my account number wrongly. To that I retorted. Fuck. I stay in hall. Now that I realise that there is an error, I am fucking pointing it out and you demand to see my bank book? Do I look like I carry it around? I was then told about the process by another staff member by the name of "Esther". That was more helpful. However, that "rectification" course of action is going to give me another round of inconvenience.

The crux of the matter is this: How can they erroneously key in my account number? I already had the bank to verify that the account exists and the number is printed bold. If the bank clerk and I were able to confirm that the number is correct, how can they not? Plus, what is with all the blame-pushing. I had to make 3 phone calls and walk to FUCKED UP PLACES, just to realise that I being played like a fucking clown.

It's time for the exams an that's what they're doing to make things more conducive for students? Is this the kind of service that students (who are the very fucking stakeholders) should receive? What are they trying to achieve by shoving the blame around? I'm totally pissed, if not regretting my time in NTU.

Anyhow, NTU sure has to work on its public image. The local media has already shown the GENERAL PUBLIC how fucked up the school is. There were many reports of professor misdemeanors, plans to further alienate students in hostels with triple-share, plans to threaten professorships within the faculties. They seem to be attacking everyone that matters to the school! What a shame that NTU is up to such shit even when they host a "premier communication and information school" in Singapore. It really is a disgrace to be a student in NTU. What more, a student at the school of communication and information.

My days in NTU are always spent brooding. Why the fuck am I required to take up so many subjects when REPUTABLE schools elsewhere have similar courses that just need me to complete 24 subjects. Hell, with the unnecessary workload I have now, I'd be able to get a triple-majors elsewhere. Boy, what career-stifling prospects I have here in NTU.

This really is bullying. If one's parents do not have the money to send their kids overseas, they have to settle for this kind of shit here. And the school uses its position as a school of choice for the choice-less to flex its fucking dick, stating the vast amounts opportunities they give to students. Yeah, those are opportunities, but are they comparable to overseas schools? Do they give you a career edge? They the flex their dicks again in bullying students with crappy services and policies. Oh, by the way, is the student union doing shit? NO! They're busy helping the school spread dismay to the student population. Yes, students bludgeoning their own kind! Oh, that in return of being the school's lapdog. Hardly is there a school-enacted, anti-student policy that is rejected by the student union. YES EVEN FOR TRIPLE ROOM.

I shall leave my further rants for later as studies beckon. Yes, I need to study like how a fucking underground mole digs through soil only to see more soil. Aptly put, I'll be doing shit that hopefully translates into good grades. My parting words, undergrads of tomorrow, AVOID NTU!

NTU is ANTI-YOU!

Cat Post

2008-04-04T09:10:00.001+08:00

Here are some cat videos that make you go awww... Thanks Lyndsey!

The End to My Existence

2008-04-03T18:05:00.002+08:00

The title is very aptly put. This semester, my existence was based on truck loads. No, shit loads of projects. What were they?

COM202: 4000-word report on how students sought information on a university course to attend.
COM204: 4 assignments on various types of media writing with a final group project simulating a public relations job.
COM208: 4 assignments that required alot of work, but worth 3-5% of my final grade.
EE8084: 3000-word case study on botnets. That's cybersecurity for you.

Now they're all over! Thank goodness, I finally have some time to take a short breather then sink into the mood for books. Exams are a bloody two weeks away. I'm now feeling this sense of loss that the bane of my existence is gone. Hmm.... weird feeling.

Oh yeah, my weekly radio show, Rock O'Clock on Radio Fusion with Lyndsey is also over. It was a really eye-opening experience to play songs and banter on air. Now I know what it takes to be a radio DJ. It was fun anyway.

I can't wait for the 24th April. Exams will be over, then I would be able to look forward to Bangkok and all that crazy shit that I'll be doing over the 3-month summer break.

Present / Future / Distractions

2008-03-27T03:08:00.004+08:00

Two and a half weeks to the exams.

I don't feel jittery because assignments and projects are my current preoccupations. Do I have time to focus on revision? NO. Screw my projects, seriously.

Four weeks (a month) to the end of the "Semester 2 Ordeal"

I just feel so burnt out this semester. Attribute that to fortnightly JCRC activities, a never-ending slew of projects and assignments coming from 4/6 of my total modules and of course, distractions. I just hope to be done with it soon.

Anyhow, I'll be going on my second trip to Bangkok in May with my friends from hall. That means... cheap booze, cheap fags (ciggs, not trannys you idiot!), bargain shopping sprees, tasty Thai food, fun, fun and more fun!

After that, I hope that my internship application goes through. One more piece of brag info on my CV, yeah!

Ok, I just ought to focus on my studies right now. Other distractions can wait.

Talking about distractions... Here's a photo I took of Ah Mao, the fat cat that visits my room.

So that's a short update of the shite I've been up to.

Damn Whirlpools; Damn Fraudsters

2008-03-23T23:23:00.003+08:00

Yeah, you saw right.

Whirlpools consisting of assignments, reports, projects and of course, the impending exams. Yes, they are pulling me down, and I'm drowning.

Ok, what a novel way to scream for attention.

Anyhow, back to whirling stuff. It seems that a tornado has ripped through my life, leaving me to clean up the entire mess. I go about daily and aimlessly with all the report writing. When I'm done, I get so tired that the thought of the impending exams just pisses me off.

I think some divine intervention is required to spur me on.

Alright, I realise that I've been MIA for a pretty long time. And in my absence a few things have happened. It's not that I've chosen to stay quiet, but the circumstances above leave me silenced. Oh well... in fact, I do have a whole load of issues to bitch/gripe/laugh about.

That includes the 'donate to needy chinaman' money laundering drive. Yes, fellow Singaporeans, voice your hatred against these money-grubbing aliens, go there and pen your most vicious thoughts. I think the sick dude deserves our sympathy, but the mention of money time after time just makes me sick. It sure doesn't look like a fund to save someone's life. It just looks like a fund to make someone more comfortable. Browsing through the comments just made my blood boil. You have proud, arrogant PRC assholes who prance about their blog comments in such a condescending manner. And of course, you have coward Singaporeans who hide behind the anonymity of the net and insult these people. Truth to be told, I'm one of them. Anyhow, just browse through the page, we Singaporeans have every reason to be pissed at these peeps. Well, if you do not get pissed off at them, then you're a bloody traitor.

I know of many friends who have been rather myopic in their view of this matter, with their view being that it's to save a life and a life is a life regardless of circumstance. So why don't they go help the starvin marvins out there in Africa? Wouldn't it be cheaper that way? With $150k you'd be able to feed an entire tribe for the whole year. That's if you wanna talk about lives.

We have to consider the implications of helping this one poor, unlucky dude. Is this, the message we would want to send out is that Singapore is such a welfare state that any poor dude who comes over and falls sick can immediately receive world-class treatment? Are we just gonna allow nobodys to ride on our tax money and leave us without even giving two hoots? Yes, we always say that there are nice sincere people in that wolf pack. But those are anomalies. If we do not generalise, how can we make decisions? Generalisation allows us to see the big picture. If governments didn't generalise, they'd compromise efficiency. If we do not generalise, we'd be better not be using collective terms in our speeches. Wolves will always be wolves. Then again, if our penny-wise, dollar-foolish friends wish to not generalise and continue to be like lambs to the slaughter, Singapore can only be generalised as a pushover, a land of ample robbery opportunities for these people.

I hope that Singaporeans do wise up to the fact that our country, our land is being invaded by money-grubbing aliens. The thing is, there is no control over this influx of leeches. Society has evolved into the bane of our very existence. It has spat on the graves of our forefathers who came here to BUILD a nation, not MOOCH OFF it.

I do not have time to further elaborate. But this very much explains my contemptuous view of these people. Through and through, I'm human. But, kindness begets kindness and shit begets shit. So, it really boils down to the shit WE AS SINGAPOREANS are getting from these people. Isn't it time that we retaliate?

Okay, I was actually thinking of typing on a plethora of topics that I missed out in my absence. But the issue on foreign talent really does rouse that fire of anger from within. It is a threat to our existence and I feel the need to play my part in saving Singapore from damnation. That's patriotism. Patriotism is not attending NDPs or singing the national anthem with pride every morning. It is knowing what's best for your country and voicing them out. So that's my message to everyone out there on the web.

Okay, I promise to talk about other, less controversial stuff in my subsequent entries. Cheerios.

Selamat Tinggal!

2008-02-29T16:53:00.006+08:00

Looks like this dude has something to say to the Ghurkas the other day. That is... Selamat Tinggal; meaning goodbye in Malay.

If he goes back to his family, they can wish him Selamat Datang!

Then he can have a Selamat Pagi, Selamat Tengah Hari, Selamat Petang and Selamat Malam with them.

And of course, if he is not caught by the end of Ramadan, we all may may wish him a Selamat Hari Raya Adilfitri.

If he is still not caught thereafter, let us all wish him a Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha as everyone goes to atone for their sins.

Good job Mas Selamat for being the next Michael Scofield!

Never Shit in Your Backyard

2008-02-26T13:12:00.003+08:00

That in many degrees...

From... Smoking in public.

To... Making poetic, a slew of vulgarities, when complaining about something to someone.

All these... knowing full well that you have a HUGE extended family and kids that look up to you.

Recess week does not feel like recess. It only gives you time to catch a short breath. Then it's full swing into the exams. I hate that. But the post-exam prospect of enjoyment is will be the thing driving me through the papers. Bah!

Last night, I settled for an insurance policy. Of course, no policy prep would be complete without the morbid talk about dying, losing an arm or a leg (that, we're losing to the rising costs). It set me thinking. How much is your life worth? Can you put a value to it? I think it is just the goodwill sum that you leave to your love ones when you say bye bye. Oh well, morbid or not, it is a fact of life.

The other day, I went on a run through my pre-matriculation route. at 10.67km/h, I superceeded my previous record timing for the 8.5km route by 5 minutes. Wow!

One more thing... there are 3 lingering words and a person on my mind now. How am I going to express them so smoothly and eloquently without being scoffed or laughed at? Damnit!

Very random, very spontaneous, very mixed up. Well, this is my train of thought. Stupid train!

Thank You, Come Again!

2008-02-22T12:15:00.002+08:00

The Electric New Paper :

Thank you - and goodbye

Every Sunday in the Singapore at Large column, The New Paper profiles the Singapore sports scene with a national or grassroots perspective. Today, LIM HAN MING looks at how the Foreign Talent Scheme has fared in the sporting arena

LIKE all new citizens of Singapore, they've taken the oath of citizenship, pledging their allegiance and loyalty to their adopted country.

18 February 2008

LIKE all new citizens of Singapore, they've taken the oath of citizenship, pledging their allegiance and loyalty to their adopted country.

On the playing field, they've given of their best, bringing glory to Singapore with their triumphs in major Games and international competitions.

So Singapore rewarded them with monetary incentives via the Singapore National Olympic Council.

But just when the foreign talent scheme seems to be bearing fruit, two of the brightest foreign-born talents decided to call it quits.

Late last month, Commonwealth Games gold-medallist Li Li shocked the local sports fraternity when she packed her bags and went back to China.

The 24-year-old, who came to Singapore in 1997 and became a citizen in 2002, cited personal reasons for her abrupt departure.

What was baffling was that despite being plagued by injuries, the world No. 27 was on course to qualify for one of the 38 berths at the Beijing Olympic Games in August.

The China-born shuttler was also part of Project 0812 - a project launched last January with the aim of landing an Olympic medal at the Beijing Games or the 2012 Games.

EXODUS IN BADMINTON AND TABLE TENNIS

Her departure completed the exodus of the pioneer batch of foreign-born shuttlers brought in by the Singapore Badminton Association, which included Rong Muxi, Xiao Luxi and Liu Fan.

Of the quartet, only Rong did not become a Singaporean.

Li is the second Commonwealth Games gold-medallist to turn her back on Singapore and return to her native country.

Last March, paddler Zhang Xueling tendered her resignation to the Singapore Table Tennis Association.

The official reason she gave was that she wanted to be with her husband, Zheng Qi, who was the former national men's assistant coach.

But it is believed that Zhang was unhappy with the lack of playing opportunities after she was dropped from the last five Pro-Tour events before her shock exit.

Before Zhang, there was Commonwealth Games women's singles bronze-medallist Xu Yan, who left our shores in 2006.

Badminton and table tennis are not the only sports that have suffered heartbreaks with their foreign-born athletes.

HOCKEY AND FOOTBALL AFFECTED TOO

The Singapore Hockey Federation also did not have much success with the six China-born players they imported in 1998.

Egmar Goncalves, the first foreign footballer to be recruited by the Football Association of Singapore under the Foreign Talent Scheme in 2002, returned to his native Brazil early last year.

The Brazilian striker scored more than 100 S-League goals for Home United, but he failed to deliver on the international stage. In 15 outings, he scored only four goals for the Lions.

When he decided to return to Brazil, it was a hush-hush affair that was reported by The New Paper.

ATHLETICS WORST OFF

The worst hit was the Singapore Athletic Association (SAA), whose problems with its China-born throwers have been well-documented.

In 2000, the SAA imported six China-born throwers who had the potential to become world-beaters.

Of the six, only Dong Enxin, Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were fast-tracked for Singapore citizenship, while the gamble failed with the younger ones such as Wang Dan, E Xiaoxu and Luan Wei.

The trio of Dong, Du and Zhang delivered medals at the South-east Asia Games, but they have since fallen out with the SAA.

When contacted, SAA president Loh Lin Kok admitted that his association's foreign talent scheme was a total failure. He told The New Paper: 'I had actually feared the worst when we brought them in.

'I was worried about what may happen and what can happen. What actually happened confirmed my fears.

'Unlike table tennis or badminton, I think we are the worst hit. It is a bitter experience I hope I would never have to go through again.'

Perhaps it's time for Singapore's sports authorities and national sports associations to re-assess the Foreign Talent Scheme and finetune it further?

ATHLETES WHO LEFT SINGAPORE

BADMINTON

Li Li
Xiao Luxi
Liu Fan

TABLE TENNIS

Zhang Xueling
Xu Yan

FOOTBALL

Egmar Goncalves

ATHLETICS

Dong Enxin
Du Xianhui
Zhang Guirong

This article speaks for itself. Quoted from The Newpaper, 18 February 2008.

If our foreign sports talents who contribute world-class performances for Singapore are leaving, can the same be said for your nobody engineers and what-elses?

Monetary rewards, training grants, sponsorships. Is there anymore these sports people can ask for? They still run away. Besides the theory of opportunistic gains by these players, I cannot fault them for not adapting well to Singapore. It can be terrible to miss one's family. The problem then lies in the catalyst. Is it a wise investment to bring them over? You spend money, tax money. You give them citizenships.

It really is spitting at Singaporeans in the face when they can just call it quits and leave without proper explanations. We, though descendants of foreigners, are still sons and daughters of the soil; born here bred here. Our forefathers have contributed to this nation's success. The men and women have dedicated their lives to the country. And yet, we get SPAT IN THE FACE? Not nice right?

Is national pride at stake? We go all out to compete for top brass and yet our locals get left out. Is it a true representation of Singapore? What national pride is there when pressure goes over the roof? What national pride is there when the income gap widens up like in an earthquake?

Re-tweaking society brings about lots of social issues. It is akin to stirring up shit. I think enough has been said about this issue and it is pointless to go about banging our heads on walls. The thing is, when crunch time comes, the all important catalyst of national pride goes missing, you see an exodus of not only foreigners but quitters.

New Week, New Resolutions

2008-02-17T14:28:00.002+08:00

Now that the festive/emo period is over. I think I should get down to some serious business.

1. For one, I shall start revising my work more often.

2. Also, I shall quit smoking.

3. Then, I shall get myself fighting fit again (more runs, more weights)

4a. Of course, I shall do whatever pleases me.
4b. That means, no more pleasing everyone. You've all gotton cakes from me. Now it's for me to have my cake and EAT IT!

Anyhow, these are my new, stress-alleviating, objectified resolutions. Hope I don't get all stressed up pursuing them.

Sometimes, your happiness/welfare supercedes the demands of the world. That's when you show them the finger and get going.

Aftermath

2008-02-15T12:22:00.002+08:00

I made it through last night. Not without a bunch of friends, 10 bottles of hard booze and a pack of cigarettes. Very vice-ful indeed. Oh well, it helped with the pain. Then again, after all that booze, what pain?

Pain is a very subjective feeling.

Oh well, kudos to all who had a marvelous valentine's.

A Flurry of Sadness

2008-02-14T20:05:00.004+08:00

Stress. Anxiety. Angst. Despair. Depression.

All this into one on the day of St Valentine. It really doesn't help that your friends feel quite indifferent to how you are feeling. You turn on the radio just to hear lovey dovey songs looping the airwaves. It reminds you of how you are single and have let chances slip you by. It literally is a spit into the face by the djs of class 95. You walk around and see couples basking in the essence of the day. It then feels like salt seeping into your open wounds. You can't take it anymore. You look for a source of escape. Your eyes then fall on the cigarette box on the table. You pick it up, but alas, you are on cold turkey. The box is empty. Shit. Big bloody shit.

You sit in front of the computer, wondering what you're gonna do to tide yourself through. The emo music blasts through your speakers. You then log on to blog about your feelings to tide yourself through.

To shut things out, you turn to religion, the Lord, God, Almighty and say,"Lord, help me make it through the night. Please."

Just hope that divine intervention helps.

Do you know how to save a life?

2008-02-14T13:17:00.000+08:00

Sigh.

Confessions of a Coward

2008-02-14T01:06:00.002+08:00

It's Valentine's Day. Yet another 14th February spent alone. It's not like I mind it. But, it's the very fact of how I've let love slip away that troubles. I'm a coward, I admit. Is it the fear of rejection? Is it the lack of affirmation? What's it? I just know that I'm a coward, but I don't know why. Sigh.

Any solutions anybody? In any case, do join me at the singles' club tonight as we do jack shit.

I'll make this a short post. I'm not in a mood to rant. That with all the piling assignments and quizzes.

Suffering is Not a Punishment but a Consequence

2008-02-04T18:43:00.000+08:00

I did a catechism lesson yesterday on the first line of the Nicene Creed.

"I believe in God the Father almighty, maker of Heaven and Earth..."

So we touched on issue on the reason why God would allow suffering in this world. This being the fact that if God is so good, why would he allow suffering in this world?

It really is a good question that baffles many, including me. The answer is actually a real simple, two-worded one. Original Sin.

God created everybody perfect and because Adam and Eve disobeyed him, the trust he had with men was lost forever. However, he still loves us enough to give us the free will. The free will to decide whether to follow him, or not. The free will to claim our place in His kingdom or not to. The free will to do whatever we want. However, laws of the world exist and basically, it is our sins and those of others that cause suffering. Sinning can be simplified as an action despite knowing its dire consequences. God of course constantly calls out to you to return to him. This comes in the form of the good people we meet and our conscience.

Then the issue comes to divine intervention. Why does God not save us from the consequences of our sins since He loves us so much? That comes back to the point of free will. If we all do not suffer the consequences of sin because of some divine intervention, it shows that our decisions bear no significance, no importance. Meaning that it is not free will in its totality. Miracles come about when we pray and repent.

I saw a point in this lesson when I watched this video on Grace's blog. Though I've watched it before, it really struck a chord this time round. Especially so after this lesson I thought about suffering. So here goes...

You're everything to God. So will you give up everything for him? Including your sins?

2008-01-17T13:02:00.000+08:00

Lesson 1: "You pay peanuts, you get monkeys"
That's what my dad told me when I complained about my colleagues from India. I did not really understand that concept initially. What I thought was that immigrants who come over for a significantly higher pay than back home would strive to do their best. Little did the concept of relativity strike me. Although out FT friends come over for a bigger pay, they, like any other human love to compare. That's when they use their manager's or superior's (who are local) as a benchmark. When they see that your pay looks like peanuts in comparison, they start acting like monkeys. So, what was the enlightening factor?

I had Ultra Supplies to thank for this valuable lesson. Why? I decided to give them a try by seeking their services in printing my hall newsletter. I was served by some cheap FT. So here's what went wrong...

Shoddy binding of the final product.
Late turnover of the printwork despite the promise of completion within an hour.
Inability to follow instructions.
Typed "Nanyang Technological" instead of "Nanyang Technological University" on the invoice.
Laziness.
Insisted on completing the job by the day I go down to collect the invoice despite my instructions for it to be done on the spot. (Which was promised by the general manger)

So yes, lesson learnt. Support locally enterprises; boycott monkey-run ones.

Lesson 2: "Taxi has become a necessity in Singapore."
This is for various reasons such as the....

difficulty in commuting onboard crowded public transport
steep prices of private automobiles
humid, sweltering weather that puts everyone off walking and waiting too long for the bus
race to overtake time
ease and convenience
need to look atas even on the slightest degree

So take your pick, what's your reason for taking a taxi? I personally like the reason of Singapore's fucked up weather. It sucked so much that I didn't mind paying $14 for a stupid cab ride. Well, it is air conditioned and fast... What's there to hate?

Will the taxi business normalise despite the prices taking a hike up north? I guess so. Most reasonably affluent Singaporeans will agree with me because we all gripe over Singapore's fucked up transport infrastructure. Taxi is the most comfortable option which is still cheaper than owning a defective, shaky and undependable Chery QQ.

It's some fucked up predicament Singapore is in man. Cheaper FTs and overcrowded, slimy, grimy transport networks. So much for trying to squeeze 6million assholes on a red dot.

Existence of Nothingness

2008-01-16T02:17:00.000+08:00

Late nights have become the norm. I struggle to find something to talk about in my routine, mundane and tiring life. Let's hope something good comes out of me soon.

Just wake me up when this sleep ends. I hope it's soon.

Wake Up Dreamer!

2008-01-11T15:04:00.000+08:00

I think I should get my act together and focus on my studies again. This semester is gonna be tougher than the last. I just know it. All I'm doing now is wallowing in surrender to the monstrosity called academic life.

The thing is, with so many things bogging me down, how am I supposed to focus? I sleep at 3am every morning, wake up for early lectures, come back from lectures, collapse into bed until dinner time. I just wish to lay down burden, take a deep breath and move on with my studies. Is that allowed? I hope so.

It all feels like a bad dream. But, real. Sigh, I need to take control. All I can do is to pray for a divine intervention. God, it's Clarence calling, please pick up the phone.

I'll Huff and I'll Puff to no Bloody Avail

2008-01-07T15:39:00.000+08:00

Today marks the first day of school for the second semester. I found myself struggling to wake up after last night's freak $6 win at super-ultra-duper-late-night mahjong. Yes, and when I finally managed to pry my eyes open, I was already half an hour late for the first lecture that wasn't even worth going (after attending half of it).

Anyhow, stuff has happened in the last month or so and that has left me disorientated, disorganised and worse of all, de-motivated. The flurry of activities has not only left me with huge eyebags, but also, a superior sense of misery. Lack of rest, staying away from home as well as dealing with irritating people just intensifies my dampened mood.

I have been putting up a brave, spirited front for the sake of friends who are down. But, who will be there for me when I get the shit? God, perhaps? I was trying so hard to enjoy a rightfully deserved Christmas and New Year break, but my efforts lead to no avail. Work and responsibilities just fill my mind. Is this a sign of burnout?

But of course, the worst possible thing is that everyone else who should be working well with you ain't giving shit. It has reached the extent that being bothered just makes this worse. My solution now is to sit back and watch everything crumble. And when the blame comes, I'll shove it around like how shit was shoved on me. I no longer give two hoots. Call me weak, call me a wuss, a coward, I will not be a clown, a puppet for everyone to push around. Seriously, fuck this shit, if I've tried my best, is there a reason to be better. Yet again, is it worth my 200%?

Yes, yes, this post has been quite cryptic. This is simply because finger pointing at this juncture is useless. Fuck it, I need to vent.

Perhaps I should learn to take the backseat. Perhaps I would.

Goodbye 2007! You Will Be Missed!

2007-12-31T21:40:00.000+08:00

I am feeling rather emotional right now as I say goodbye to 2007. I guess it's because the year has been good to me and I'm just sad to see it pass. This also means growing old by another year. Well, it's time to look forward to better things. Perhaps there are lessons to be learnt from the Aud Lang Syne.

2007, a year of many new experiences, new friendships, new opportunities and of course the year I turn 21.

Have a happy new year my friends and may the good Lord bless and keep you! Wishing you many happy returns ahead!

Green-Faced Singaporeans

2007-12-27T22:48:00.000+08:00

No, it's not that people are falling ill. OR perhaps so, judging from the recent spate of food poisoning cases because of food handlers at Sentosa and Prima Deli who do not wash their hands after wiping their arses. Anyhow, it's about the all-out price hikes that are happening.

The Wannadies

2007-12-24T02:16:00.000+08:00

I'm hooked onto their songs. Catchy, upbeat and happy.

Yes, they are the guys who brought to you the You and Me Song.

Go check out the rest of their songs on Youtube.

Myths Unrevealed : The Chinaman Discovered

2007-12-24T01:29:00.000+08:00

Yeah, loooonnng time no update. Blame that on hall activities. Well, 'blame' isn't quite the word to use here because my involvement in hall activities is voluntary after all. Okay, so just attribute my lack of updates to my preoccupation with hall stuff. Anyhow, the time I spent in hall has enlightened me like how Discovery Channel does. Well, not on animals, but Chinamen. Not Chinese people, but natives of China. Let me go through the series of great discoveries with you.

1. Chinamen work out in the gym wearing buttoned shirts (!!) and without towels (!!!)
Yes, that chinky at the benchpress machine is wearing a shirt meant for kai kai and his sweat has seeped through the fabric. The bench then starts to look like it has taken a bath.

2. My neighbour (chinaman) does not wash his hands after laying bricks.
I entered the toilet one morning to be greeted by the smell of human dumplings. Then I heard a flush. The next thing I knew, the person inside the cubicle dashed out of the toilet without even looking at the sinks. It is no wonder why there's a recent spike in salmonella poisoning cases. Yeah, those food handlers at Prima Deli are from China.

3. This other chinaman does not close the cubicle door when he shits.
I was all blurred up from the good sleep I had the night before when I entered the toilet to brush my teeth. The next thing I knew, I saw this guy squatting over a toilet bowl with a brown tail hanging off his ass. I shook myself awake for a clearer gander. Then, he slammed the door shut. Shudders...

4. If you ain't got the trunks, use the briefs.
I was at the school swimming complex and I saw these two scrawny guys lying on the deck chairs. Oh, don't their trunks look cotton? Ok, I take that back. They ain't trunks, they're briefs. Since when did trunks become the latest in swimwear fashion?

5. Chinamen don't lack surprise supplies.
Yes, from the last four things observed, I'm convinced that time will see more outrageous stuff cooked up by our friends from China. Stay tuned to Shock TV. Haha...

So what else has happened in my life?

I've taken up a part-time job checking in fat, rich tourists for Royal Caribbean Cruises. The job sucks, oh well customer service sucks. I should be the customer, not the freaking monkey doing the service. You'll know why in one of my subsequent blog posts.

So if I don't make it back to this blog on time, here's wishing you a Merry Christmas and of course a Happy New Year, may they be a blast! And may your wishes come true!

Are You My Wonderwall?

2007-12-11T15:13:00.000+08:00

Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now

Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
But I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me ?
And after an
You're my wonderwall

Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me

Granny Says...

2007-12-11T14:36:00.000+08:00

The guy below is gonna burn in hell for this...

Sunshine After the Rain

2007-12-10T20:45:00.000+08:00

Well, that's what I wanna see.

Clear, sunny skies with warm sunlight caressing my skin. That's what I want. Not some bullshit dark, emo weather.

Well, that's because I need my swim training.

Anyhow, don't know if you've heard of the cruise ship 'Rhapsody of the Seas' coming to Singapore. Well, I took up a job in facilitating the embarkation and disembarkation of guests. All's fine and dandy except for the prolonged periods spent on my feet and guests who act like pricks. $8/h and a sore feet at the end of the day. Could I ask for more?

Oh yes, one more thing. The uniform sucks. I look like a manager at Delifrance. I shall post a photo when I get to doing it. Bah. Dead tired! 6am - 4pm without sitting sucks!

Oh well, take it in my stride... provided I can move in strides with my sore foot.

Run Your Own Race

2007-12-04T09:00:00.000+08:00

Yes, I've done it!

This was the first marathon that I've taken part in and it was done with much pain. Now, I wish to take part in next year's marathon. Yes, you heard me! Running sure is addictive. Well, that's how good I felt at completing the marathon.

Let me now recall the proceedings of that day....

3am- Wakey wakey, time to haul ass to the Padang.

5.30am- Bang! The race is ~~flagged~~ gunned off. My personal race begins; the start of a personal battle to complete 42km on foot.

From there on I didn't quite take note of the time. The distance only mattered then.

At the 24km mark, I saw the 4:30 pacesetter running past me. That meant that I would be looking to complete the race in 4hours 30minutes if I kept up with him. I realised that I did pretty well then. That was where the calf cramps hit me with full force. It was also when I started to slow down. The cramps seriously hurt like f**k. So much so that I was freaking tearing.(not crying!)

My slow jogs soon became walking. I was then further reduced to a limp. Bloody cramps! Argh. Yes, and as expected, the 4:45, 5:00, 5:15.... pacer ran past me. It was just super demoralising. Even the dude that was dressed as spiderman overtook me. Damnit, I guess I was wrong to judge him a clown at the start of the race. Anyhow, I dragged myself down the remaining 17km.

At 41km I realised I wouldn't want to be photographed walking past the finishing line. So I went up to one of the route marshalers and had got my calf treated with deep heat. That really helped to relieve the pain. From then on I started running again. Then as I turned the bend into the final stretch, I was greeted by the thousands of supporters cheering the runners on. That was where I felt most motivated to push myself further. I picked up speed and sprinted toward the finish. As I crossed the line, that sense of completion, satisfaction and joy just surged through me. That euphoria was totally unmatched. Finishing time: 5h 59m 32s

The only regret here is that I did not complete the race by running. Next year, I shall load up on more salt the day before to prevent cramps.

I think I shall make this the first of a 2-part entry with this being the account of my struggle. The picture below is a screenshot of my race results and statistics. Click to enlarge.

You Two Careful, He is a Big

2007-11-29T22:16:00.000+08:00

This has got me in stitches....
Wanna know why? Click here...

A Happy Belated...

2007-11-29T20:32:00.000+08:00

Yeah, my exams ended yesterday. Seems my concept of going wild isn't exactly that wild. It was wild with the 'w' flipped upside down. Yeah, mild.

So what did I do exactly?

I went beer shopping.
I went to the gym and the pool.
I went to Ikea and got a bunch of stuff for my hostel room.

That's all. Oh well, I guess humans are like cars, we take some time to warm up to the fun and joy of not having an exam.

The Evolution of Panties

2007-11-27T23:52:00.001+08:00

Caught this on Facebook... LOL

Just Chillin

2007-11-27T22:44:00.000+08:00

I'm listening to Josh Groban and chilling over some beer right now. Really relaxing. What's lacking is a good pair of speakers. Should I start saving for the pair below?

Just imagine the crisp sound coupled with the deep amplified bass that comes with the Bose Companion 3. Pure heaven.

Oh well, I'll just have to make do with my $15 Logitecs.

Oh, BTW, screw maths! I can't emphasise that enough.... LOL

Lust

2007-11-27T21:09:00.001+08:00

Somebody willing to help this audiophile to this?

Compooter Engineering Fagculty Suckjects

2007-11-27T20:23:00.000+08:00

You know something's bothering you. But, you try not to bother. But, yet, it bugs you like hell. Then in the effort to alleviate that, you start to bother about it.

F**k maths. Damnit! Goes to show how wrong first impressions can be.

I've been waiting since the 19th of November to get that shit off my back. Trust me, I am really gonna burn my maths notes come tomorrow afternoon. 1500H to be precise. No, 1530H, because I'll have to head to hall after the exams to collect my notes.

Note to self- Never take modules where ah tiongs and apus form the majority. You'll end up failing miserably. Then you'll start feeling a superior sense of inferiority.

Superfunny

2007-11-27T03:05:00.000+08:00

Well, if you like senseless humour just go watch this. It's something of the American Pie genre... Superbad is superfunny!

Totally Randon Shit

2007-11-26T23:45:00.000+08:00

Stuff that makes you go WTF!, but you still end up laughing...

silverFISH!

2007-11-25T23:29:00.000+08:00

By that, I meant my IPPT results.

Yes, this is the annual ritual that most males have to undergo after being released from Full-time National Service.

For some, it really sucks to train up for that big day and perhaps fail or achieve a scrappy pass.

For the fitness-conscious, it is a day to rejoice because it's some money in the bag. Yea, you do get monetary incentives for achieving better scores.

Anyhow, I was looking to score a gold at this year's test. Sadly, I only managed a silver. Oh well, $200 is better than nothing.

Here are my results...

On the whole, this is my best score ever, discounting the pull-up station. Stupid demoralising machine refused to count all the pull-ups I did. Damnit!

Oh well, $200 earned. Not bad for an hour's effort.

P4wn Them Xenos and Pseudoxenos

2007-11-22T13:58:00.000+08:00

Apparantly, some Ang Mo and his SPG bitch attacked these two students at Toa Payoh Hub. Seriously WTF man. I sure am glad that those uncles came in to help. If not for them, we'd have another hit'n run incident like Bo Davis and his inbred friends bullying a trishaw rider.

Seriously, who do these xenos think they are? Coming over and screwing up our already screwed up society. It's as shitty as it can be over here, we don't need more people to stir the shit.

First, it's the trishaw incident, now this, then what?

Well, at least this is the first step toward national pride; standing up for your fellow Singaporeans. (not standing up for Singapore) This is the kind of cool shit we need in our society. We don't need to go about proclaiming our supposed love for the state. It only takes a little care and concern for your neighbours and it goes a long way.

My only hope now is for a civil case to proceed and this couple be ~~knee deep~~ submerged in shit. We've seen many cases whereby our xeno friends skip out of court (tra~laa~laa) with lighter sentences and our local lads suffering. (All for the same offence) I do hope that Singapore law does not impose double standards and let them off lightly.

Yes, Yes Yall, We Don't Stop...

2007-11-22T12:48:00.000+08:00

Is it really so that our top media hounds are hip and cool and can rap. So what sort of image is this supposed to portray? That we're on track to become a 'fusionpolis' a 'media hub' and what not? Seriously, Singapore's aim is to become a polis state. Really... Haha.... See? I can be cool with wordplay too...

Meow!

2007-11-22T02:54:00.000+08:00

I got bored and decided to do up a collage of Ah Mao. LOL
It's not been back to visit for a long time!

Transformers, Robots In (Really Good) Disguise(s)

2007-11-22T02:39:00.000+08:00

The next time you move house, do make sure you're not moving a Transformer.

A Clean Room Goes a Long Way

2007-11-21T23:54:00.001+08:00

I realised that my hostel room just got too dusty for my liking. I mopped the floor three times over, cleaned the fans and took care of the cob webs. Now it's squeaky clean and I'm liking in. Now, I'll need to look for my spongebob sheets!

Mathematics Lesson: Count Your Regrets

2007-11-21T22:46:00.001+08:00

I know it is the end of the exams as much as I'm practically concerned. But, something still hangs over my head. It's stupid CPE103-Mathematics I. I don't give two hoots to this subject that has caused me much pain and misery. But, it still counts to the credits that I amass this semester. Well, not for my Grade Point Average (GPA ) because I have requested it to be considered as a satisfactory/unsatisfactory subject. That means, if I do score a C and above, I'd be given the credits but the grade will not be included in my GPA.

So, should I study or not? That's the question...

Another reason not to study is also that the paper is open book. But with it being so, I should do more practice because I have foreign talent to spoil the good market.

Oh heck, I think I will just do some mathematics sums daily. That should count... plah! phooey! spit! pui!

Mathematics really is a pain in the butt. Not only so, it's a pain in the asshole! Damnit! Why couldn't I pick a simpler module?

Why Did the Power Rangers Go to Jail?

2007-11-20T04:18:00.000+08:00

They said,"It's morphine time!"

Der Deutschesexamina

2007-11-18T20:09:00.000+08:00

Ich habe morgen ein Deutshesexamina.
Ich bin im streß.
Bitte betest du für mich.
Danke!

Guess Who's Back, Back Again!

2007-11-16T02:43:00.000+08:00

Look who visited me again!
It's Ah Mao!

I know this sounds gay...
But it really made my day!

Half Pass Six

2007-11-15T16:48:00.000+08:00

I've officially seen the end to three of my six modules this semester. Now, I have three more papers before this ordeal is over.

The exam has been rather smooth sailing so far. I do not know if it is mediocrity acting up but I feel that I did decent on all the papers I've sat for. That, knowing that there were questions left half-answered and moments that left me scratching my head. I guess it is some comfort in knowing that I've pushed myself mentally after two years away from the books. The best thing is, I do not feel the stress. I just don't know why. Is it desensitising at work? Well, I only have God to thank for making it thus far; surviving three wrist-breaking, finger-mangling papers is not easy!

Alright. As the navy anthem goes... Onwards and Upwards. That's where I shall push myself for the subsequent papers. This optimism is just so rare! Oh well, cherish it before it's gone!

The Cheers Before Tears

2007-11-13T22:44:00.000+08:00

Popped a Heineken with Guo Wei.
Nothing beats some nice, sweet beer before the exams.
De-stressing? Nope. I'd like to call it a comfort drink.
Some form of indulgence before the start of a painful process (re-lived after 2 years)
Yup, it's call the cheers before tears.

Anyhow, here's a picture of Ah Mao, the cat that frequents my room...

Xams

2007-11-13T19:47:00.000+08:00

Please pray for my safety as I navigate though this period of my tumultuous being. Seeya after the 19th!

Feverish Week

2007-11-11T14:10:00.000+08:00

Exams are on their way. That meaning that exams are ending! Sure, blame me for being optimistic. It's not as if I'm liking this predicament I'm in now. Studying is really a measure of how much you hate yourself.

Oh well, I'm going into isolation for the next week and a half. That's when I complete 5 of my 6 modules. Fuck the last one, bloody engineering maths; 28th November. I really wonder how engineering students survive. Perhaps they don't?

Newest Acquisitions

2007-11-10T19:49:00.000+08:00

Yup, here are some of the albums I've gotten recently...

Furry Guest

2007-11-09T04:19:00.000+08:00

Look who visited at 1am in the morning!
It had some sardines and milo!

Siao Eh! Jenny Got Problem Ah?!

2007-11-08T14:55:00.000+08:00

This song's interesting. Stuff that really baffles guys...

The Click Five - Jenny

She calls me baby, then she won't call me.
Says she adores me and then ignores me.
Jenny, what's the problem?
She keeps her distance and sits on fences.
Puts up resistance and builds defenses.

Jenny, what's the problem?
You leave me hanging on the line.
Every time you change your mind.

First You say you won't, then you say you will.
You keep me hanging on, and we're not moving on.
We're standing still, Jenny. You got me on my knees.
Jenny, it's killing me.

She needs her own space. She's playing mind games.
Ends up at my place saying that she's changed.
Jenny, what's the problem?
I'm trying to read between the lines.
You got me going out of my mind.

First, you say you won't, then you say you will.
You keep me hanging on, and we're not moving on.
We're standing still, Jenny. You got me on my knees.
Jenny, it's killing me. It's killing me. It's killing me.
Jenny.

First, you say you won't, then you say you will.
You keep me hanging on, and we're not moving on.
We're standing still, Jenny. You got me on my knees.
Jenny.

First, you say you won't, then you say you will.
You keep me hanging on, and we're not moving on.
We're standing still, Jenny. You got me on my knees.
Jenny. It's killing me. It's killing me. Jenny.

In the Words of My Professor...

2007-11-07T23:11:00.000+08:00

Clarence Koh:

Interesting points from the internship reports. You could have linked these to more of the material covered in the course. Hope the passion survives.

Grade: B+

-------------------------------------------------

Yup, I guess I did decent on my first term paper...

Sianz

2007-11-07T01:02:00.001+08:00

▲In the words of a Singaporean technogeek, I'm bored.

I seem to be blogging more now than ever?
Is it a distraction from my studies?
I suppose so...
I hope not...

Oh yeah, about the unpleasant entry below... I have come to the realisation that I'm being resented by people I consider to be friends. I resent that and I will resent them. It's not as if I've done something wrong. Even if I have, gossiping isn't a way to settle the problem. I always thought that varsity students had brains. I guess they left them back at JC. Pampered, prissy-piss cowards.

Undesirable.

2007-11-06T22:44:00.000+08:00

I hate high-context communication. You'll have to constantly figure out what others insinuate. That's bloody irritating.

To someone: if you have something to say, some opinion about me. Say it. Otherwise, don't go around telling others about your disgruntlement. Especially when the 'others' know me personally. Oh, by the way, I am really sensitive to words and that really tells me what sort of a person you are. Thanks for all that patronising. It was helpful in deciphering your character. And if you really treasure that distance, I guess I'll hand it to you. Thanks for a valuable life-lesson.

So if you're going to go all high context on me, I'll do the same. Hopefully, your conscience haunts you so bad that you'd figure out who this refers to.

Graciousness Out of Nothing

2007-11-06T13:01:00.000+08:00

Even the trishaw rider who leads a hand to mouth existence forgives those asshats for not paying up.

Those britbastards ought to be ashamed of themselves; their parents ought to be sorry they were born.

What Scares You?

2007-11-06T11:16:00.000+08:00

I've included a new link under "Internet Democracy".

It's labeled "Political Commentaries on Singapore".

That is a blog set up by Catherine Lim. It is where she stores her works of literary and intellectual art. Do take a look. Especially the last entry, which is "An Open Letter to the Prime Minister"

American social writer, Eric Hoffer says that,

"it is when power is wedded to chronic fear that it becomes formidable."

That indeed has become a force to be reckoned with in Singapore. Politics has no place for most Singaporeans who are afraid of leaving their comfort zone for that two cents worth. The thing is, true democracy lies in the fact that one can speak his or her mind without leaving the comfort zone. Do we have a platform to discuss non-trivial issues? Will we have a chance to have our words transcended into actions? Only time will tell.

That fear that binds us, the fear that separates us, could be key to our collectivity in seeking a truly progressive and constructive society. For when we get jaded with that fear, we rouse to a new level of enlightenment and passion for societal reforms.

I think I shall end off quoting John F. Murray, a sports performance psychologist who's sports-centric statement applies really well to society.

"Fear is essential for courage"

Let us all get sick of fear.

Sleepers Creepers

2007-11-06T03:06:00.001+08:00

I should be sleeping right now, but I'm caffeine-struck and wide-eyed. Thanks to Nescafe.

I'm sure some of you guys have seen the video of three British tourists poking fun at an elderly trishaw rider. For your convenience, I've placed the video here.

Seriously man, we have to stop whoring ourselves out to tourists. We Singaporeans should stand up to such shit and give them bloody condescending tourists a good beating. However, such shit happens around the world. That's the joke about tourism, you whore yourself out for tourist dollar. It's just like (excuse my French) choking on some big fat tourist dick.

Of course, I maybe generalising. But such shit needs to be stopped. This also includes fucking Singaporean tourists who head over to the likes of Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia and act like bloody kings. Honestly, if money were no object, do you think they'd allow such shit to befall them? Fuck, no!

What about the idea of interracial respect so proudly proliferated in the world? Where has all that gone to? Up some guy's ass?

Call me a sensitive prick, but this really is an issue of human rights. We keep talking about equality, democracy and all that shit. But, in practice, we abuse others in so many ways that violate our preachings. All that without even thinking twice or even once.

Personally, I've got two experiences of asshat tourists. First was when I was in Thailand. I was in the queue for the metro tickets. It was my turn to purchase the tickets from the machine. When I turned round to my friends for some change, this white guy cut in to purchase his tickets. The thing is, there was a sprawling line behind me and he had the fucking cheek to jump queue. Does he think his top US buck will bring him anywhere? Now look at who's laughing with the US economy facing problems from impoverished fuckers who can't afford to pay up their sub-prime loans.

Then there was an impersonal experience at Clarke Quay's Mcdonalds. Some Dutch tourists were flinging their food around the restaurant. Apparently, they were also unhappy about some aspects of the service at the restaurant and were abusive with the counter staff. Who the fuck do they think they are? Sons of Amsterdam whores!

A serious note to all: If you are visiting a country, please show respect. If you have some ethnocentric issues, just stay at home and sulk over your inability to accept others as equal.

This is by no means some lecture on morality. But, really, something needs to be done.

Oh by the way, I refuse to quote the article from the Newpaper because the apology from Bo Davis was just too unrepentant and unapologetic. Yes, the irony. It really infuriates.

Hardened Studying

2007-11-03T13:05:00.000+08:00

I am currently at Starbucks, Wisma Atria, enjoying the usual favourite (Iced Venti Latte). Is this a reward for my hard work last night? I have a feeling not... Let's see... Half completed mathematics and economics tutorials, half-assed note making for two lectures worth of HE191 curriculum.

This really sets me worrying about the impending examinations. I just seem unable to focus and deliver on the self-promises I make. One half wants to relax, while the other keeps yelling at me to study. Everything is in halves.

At this point in time, I'm prety sure that studying is not my thing. Really. I know I have said this a gazillion times before, but I do hope that the time I spend at NTU would fly. I'm not sure though if it were another college. But yes, that NTU or perhaps localised 'I-mug-cos-I-wanna-be-better' culture sure puts many off. It has reached a point where many students feel disillusioned, pissed off and perhaps depressed.

Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. That's all that we can do. The other choice is, well, study. Hardened Studying.

Site Revamp

2007-11-03T02:44:00.001+08:00

I'll probably change the layout of my site after the exams. I'm feeling kinda disgruntled about the template.

Let's hope that you'll see something more befitting a personal site.

What Up Your's, Doc?

2007-11-01T14:15:00.001+08:00

What a title!

So, here I am, supposedly studying. Yes, supposedly. Here are some updates and rants on stuff that popped up recently.

New Bag
Being restless with all that studying, I decided to do some online shopping. So, I paid a visit to http://www.chromebags.com and browsed through their range of messenger bags. They looked super interesting and have some unique features. I have been contemplating about getting a messenger bag lately. The irrational and rational sides of my brain deliberated the pros and cos of getting a new bag. Before I knew it, a few clicks and taps of the keyboard and mouse got my order details processed for checkout. The breakdown of costs was US$110 for the bag, US$170++ with delivery to Singapore. That's roughly SGD$220! $90 for delivery? Outrageous! Hence, I hatched a plan to drive the price of my newest acquisition down. I switched to MSN and spoke to my cousin, Melvin who's studying the the US of A. He agreed to receive the bag for me then bring it down to Singapore the next time he returns. Because of his generosity, I saved a great deal and paid only SGD$175 for the bag. The only catch is that I'll have to wait till January in order to receive the bag. Oh well, I can wait. It is better than to get another crumpler bag; every blooming fool is carrying one. Even me! I cringe whenever I see somebody carrying the same bag as me... That's another issue altogether.... So here's the bag..

On 377A
Yes, yes, the great debate on whether guy-on-guy buggery is allowed. I still remain divided on this issue (especially so on the aspect of religion). Why? Here's why...

Keep 377A!: Being Catholic, I have been brought up to believe and understand why buggery is wrong. I have been brought up to know that homosexuality is somewhat unnatural, and goes into the grain of procreation and nature. I do realise that repealing 377A might mean a liberalisation of views and reflect society's acceptance of gay acts. Might it imply that it is encouraged? Well, simply because society sees laws in polarity, with legal acts being encouraged and illegal acts being discouraged. Then again, might repealing 377A pave the way for same-sex marriages; which in the eyes of traditionalists (the majority), is wrong? Being Catholics, if we say at the beginning of mass, the penitential rite that we are sorry for "what I have done, and in what I have failed to do". Hence would it be right to just stand by as we watch homosexuality corrode our traditional values?

Repeal 377A!: On the other side, Catholics believe in free will. God did not will that we love him, He justs ask that we love Him. He warned us not to sin, but we still fall to sin due to our imperfect selves. In the same sense, God tells everyone not to be gay, but it is still your will. Hence, if the world decides to fall to sin against your will, do you have a choice? Like when the world wars happened, the world fell into the sin of murder, it was a great disappointment, but was there a choice? It happened. Hence, it is pointless to try to stop an out-of-control charging train. I know that our penitential creed seeks that we be proactive in preventing evils in our society, but when it cannot be helped, it cannot be helped. All we can do now is to pray that the world will not fall to sin and we ourselves stay out of it.

Conclusion: Layers upon layers of arguments crop up for and against the repealing of 377A. However, I feel that it is pointless to try to convince and coerce others into supporting or protesting those causes. It lies on the individual to think and deliberate based on the information presented on what's right and wrong. In that sense, true democracy, an idea on which both camps can agree on is the answer to the problem. If society feels it is ready to fall to sin, then repeal it. Otherwise, keep it. Gay buggery can still be 'negotiated' privately.

My View: Personally, I am for keeping 377A because I believe it is unnatural. Repealing the law would make me disappointed. However, in respect and love for mankind, I wouldn't hold any bitter feelings. Why should I bother about what another individual does when I have already tried to lead him away from what I regard as sin? We make our own choices, we choose our own poison. The debate over what is right and what is wrong is just mankind being judgmental. God will judge in the end.

Well, I think I should stop here and really get back to some studying!

Exam Fever

2007-10-28T01:01:00.000+08:00

I'm currently gripped by exam fever. I feel the stress, I feel the anxiety, I feel the need to study....
But I just can't get down to it! Damnit!

For the religious, please pray that I do? Thank you!

The Day After

2007-10-23T20:02:00.000+08:00

I must thank a few people for giving me such a great birthday....

My family for throwing such a great party for me!
My relatives for coming down for my party.
7th JCRC for the nice cake and presents and the auto-ponding experience.
Juicy and Jacqueline for the pack of milo.
Members of James Bond, my hall orientation OG, who surprised me with a make-shift cake that tasted great! Also for the bottle of vodka ribena.
Members of Sherlock who came by my room to drink last night.
And of course, those who ended up cleaning up my puke! So sorry! I owe all of you one!
All well wishers!

Well, my 21st birthday wasn't as unhappening as I thought it'd be. In fact, I'm super happy! Thanks to all who made "my day" my day!

Btw, I just found a super old-school song.... enjoy!

Ich bin heute geboren!

2007-10-22T01:17:00.000+08:00

Yup! It's my birthday today! I'm finally 21.

Traditionally, it's the age of emancipation. It's when someone finally says that he/she's an adult and is/will be self-sufficient.

As for the parents, they'd see their child as a testament of their hard work.

To me, this birthday feels somewhat bittersweet.

I'm celebrating 21 years of existence in this period of deep, troubling mental turmoil. All because the exams and responsibilities and sadness looming overhead.

However, the sweetness just reminds me of how much I matter to my family and friends. It also allows me to acknowledge the hard work my parents have put into raising me into the person I am. This also lets me look back in time an realise that with every obstacle, someone or something was there to tide me over.

What would I have to fear then? Why should I let that bitterness bother me? I have everything to be thankful for and nothing to regret. God has blessed me with family and friends and I should cherish them instead of sulking and wallowing in moments of depression.

If I could re-write what Forrest Gump said. It's be, "Life's like a box of dark chocolates; bitter in taste, sweetness in tasting."

My wish this birthday is to see myself through a proper varsity life, get a job and repay my parents kindness. Just something simple. That's just the right thing to do.

I'm feeling very emotional right now.

Fug You Fugging Fuggers!

2007-10-21T21:29:00.000+08:00

I am currently discussing some shit skit with my fucking groupmates from German class. I hate them. Besides being fucking distracting in class with their "what did he say" questions, one of them is psycho and the other is an inapt fuckingforeignfuck.

As for the psycho girl, she apparantly has something weird going on. She constantly lives in fear of her GPA dropping below 4 when it is currently 4.5+++. It was so bad that she called me up after a quiz and wasted an hour of my life pouring out the same shit about her fear for her German grades. Honestly, I don't give a fuck. But, being nice, I kept repeating the point that it is pointless worrying cos the quiz is over. Yet, she refused to fucking hang up and continued to grief over her feelings of inadequacies. Really, I don't give a fuck. Then on the Monday following the phone conversation with her, something she did really freaked me out. I was rushing back to hall for a meeting and left class in a hurry. I was sure I dashed out at the earliest opportunity; even before everyone started packing. However, on my way back, she ran just to catch up with me. Seriously, what the fuck? Who sprints just to catch up with someone for an after-class conversation? Ugh! The thing is, we're only classmates and I seriously have got no extra-platonic relationship with her. So why the fuck is she doing stuff like that? I'm just freaked.

As for that fuckingforeignfuck, he constantly misses whatever the tutor says and ends up asking the peeps around him to translate what the tutor. Because of that everyone else gets distracted. What the fuck. Besides, he consistently does jack shit for his homework and ends up copying others and poking others for answers when it's turn to answer a question.

Arghhhhhhh!!!

Fucking irritating!!! Make them stop!!!! Seriously, I'll choke them till my hands go numb if given the chance!

Sorry for this angsty post. I just need to let off some steam. Shit, I'm better off sticking to CS people. Definitely. Most so.

Inspirational Shoot

2007-10-20T14:09:00.000+08:00

Was judge executioner in the Beijing olympic planning committee? I guess so... haha

The Roof, The Roof, The Roof, is on Fire!

2007-10-20T00:15:00.000+08:00

And so, while I was away from home, the market & food centre near my place burned down. It's kinda sad that I would not be able to get great food at such convenience while it is being rebuilt.

In the mean time, I shall speculate and bitch about the possible causes of the fire. Well, it's good food and the convenience that I'll be missing here, so I do have bitching rights!

Okay, so which idiot caused the fire? I do have some clues here...

Wasn't it somewhat fast that they (meaning stallholders, MPs and all) got together and decided on erecting a temporary market and the costs involved plus the amount to be disbursed to stallholders who would call it quits.

Then again, how could a fire engulf the market within minutes?

It happened so fast that a conspiracy might just be the reason for the fire.

A look into the happenings before the fire reveals that the stallholder committee was in disagreement over the building of an upgraded market due to increased costs and interruptions to business. Some were for it but some weren't. In the first place, it was the government that suggested the 'upgrading'

Conspiracy theories:

Could the fire be the act of some stallholder who is trying to force his will upon others? Since burning down the market would force a rebuilding no matter what.
Could it be the work of someone in the government?
Could it be rats that gnawed on wires causing a shock circuit?
Could it be a bunch of delinquents conducting arson?

Ok, the last 2 don't count. So yeah, choose between 1 and 2. Plausible?

Muggertoad

2007-10-17T13:48:00.000+08:00

Ribbit! Ribbit! How are you? Form now on, I'm going to lap up piles upon piles of exam notes with my long, extendable tongue! Will become a human after the exams.

Muggertoad felt the reluctance to come out of the hole to play.

Of Lameness and Sea Serpents

2007-10-16T11:03:00.000+08:00

Friend: I'm a light sleeper
Me: Then one can run faster with you.

That was the most nonsensical crap I've ever spewed.

On to something else...

I was reflecting on the different junctures of my life, the people I met and the things I've learnt. Then, national service came to mind. I realise that it was the days spent in the Navy that I learnt about hardship, basic economics (yes!), management and positive human interaction. Well, it wasn't exactly a conducive environment where growth is nurtured. It was a place where growth hits you. Here's an elaboration...

Hardship is when you endure 3 days worth of choppy seas, confinement for returning to ship drunk and not waking up in time thereafter and doing so much work with little or no prospect of rest. It's also when you get more than two earfuls from your superiors when you make a mistake.

My lessons in economics dealt mainly with demand and supply, consumer and producer surplus, willingness to pay and facing tradeoffs. Just think of guard duty as a compulsory service.

Supply comes from service personnel, demand comes from personnel who do not want to do their duties.
Then comes the willingness to pay for someone to cover your duty. That normally lies in the $200 zone.
Then for those who offer duty-covering services, cost price would lie in the $120 zone.
Then of course, there is a price equilibrium which fluctuates between $150 and $180.
Tradeoff for the consumer: some spare cash for precious time to spend with loved ones.
As for the supplier: precious time for some spare cash.
Then, the market is actually a free market with low barriers of entry.
With profit being so high, more will enter the market.
That drives the profit closer to zero.
Some even enter with low cost price, thus pushing duty fees lower.
That's what most people would term 'spoil market'. (damn fuggers!)

Anyhow, I've earned close to $1500 in helping others enjoy quality, precious time with friends and family.

Management
Imagine an octopus answering many phone calls. Plausible? Then, imagine a human handling that amount of calls. We don't even have eight hands!
Then was also the means that got me 2 months away from work. Piecing a delicate mix of leave, offs and wisdom teeth extraction dates together was a tough task. Mind-wrecking, but absolutely rewarding!
I've also learnt the 20:80 principle where one leverages on the 20% effort to earn that 80% benefit, hence completing tasks and meeting targets.

Positive Human Interaction
One of the great things about national service was that I was given the honour to mix with such a diverse group of people; from dropouts to scholars. And it was perhaps through them that I learnt all of the above. From crude humour to slacking strategies to important life lessons. You have your teachers in Navy personnel. I guess it's them who manage to shape the person I am today; real, quick-witted and vulgar.

The comes the question... Why don't I sign on with the Navy? Well, there are times in life where you have to move on. I guess it was a great experience altogether, but it was under the circumstances of national service. However, I will not forget and I will always reminisce on the times spent getting screwed, screwing around and seeing others get screwed. I'll always cherish the time spent in the Navy.

Depressed

2007-10-14T16:20:00.000+08:00

Why do I get into such bouts time and again?

Does it concur with the hypothesis that life is about cycles? I am really muddled as I try to navigate myself around life's obstacles. Is it true that complexities make life interesting? To me, it has become somewhat of a farce. Long has that optimism faded. That done, pessimism, cynicism and all things shitty just fill that void.

Exams, assignments, competitions, social life, money and other factors just seem to complicate and bewilder, not enrich.

The last two cycles revolved around the jaded feeling of work and national service. Now, it's my education at it's final stage?

Is escape an option? What has happened to my "grab life by the balls" mindset? I'm just tired. Maybe.

Cigarettes don't seem to provide relief anymore. Alcohol just makes me hate myself more. It's really a torment.

I guess, in this time of hopelessness and disillusionment, I should turn to God. I need comfort, I need strength. God, please hear my plea for your embrace.

Strong Enough by Sheryl Crow
God, I feel like hell tonight
Tears of rage I cannot fight
I’d be the last to help you understand
Are you strong enough to be my man?

Nothing’s true and nothing’s right
So let me be alone tonight
Cause you can’t change the way I am
Are you strong enough to be my man?

Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave

I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
It’s try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?

When I’ve shown you that I just don’t care
When I’m throwing punches in the air
When I’m broken down and I can’t stand
Will you be strong enough to be my man?

Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

2007-10-13T20:57:00.000+08:00

I seem to be in the Hari Raya mood. That raya jingle keeps ringing in my head. It's perhaps on its 10,000th loop right now. Oh well, I've got no complaints about it.

Well, it's good that I'm in such a holidaying mood this weekend. Next week, I shall unleash the no-life-low-life, over studious mugger in me. Three cheers for the impending finals!

2 Lessons Learnt

2007-10-05T13:26:00.000+08:00

My week-long quest for lessons came in a very unconventional, detrimental form.

1. Don't Get Drunk
I know that I've been telling myself this time and again. But, nothing serves as a better reminder than the (re)experience.
300ml of mixed liquor = one big, fucking massive hang over. A shitload of regret.

2. Arcade games from the 90s are (still) bloody addictive
Remember Street Fighter II? or Marvel vs Capcom?
I downloaded the emulator.
I played Bishi-Bashi and Cadillacs & Dinosaurs till 3am. So much for being focused on keeping my energy up during the day.

Drunk Fuck

2007-10-04T02:22:00.000+08:00

Drunken Weight Lifting
Drunken Badminton
That's the shit that you do after too much vodka and whisky!
Fooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

Disillusionment

2007-10-02T23:01:00.000+08:00

If tutorials aren't enough to cover the content of exams, what's the point at mastering them? You're still going to fail.

That's what I call the NTU Disillusionment.

By the way I got back the scores of a mid-term quiz, I scored 80%. The average score was 82.5% What the hell. Is NTU über competitive or what?

Sometimes, I wish my parents were rich enough to afford a foreign education for me. Then I would not have to worry about competition. Besides, I will return with a much more recognised degree. Locals are really subjecting themselves to a whole lot of crap just for a lousy cert which half of China probably has.

Myyannnmmar!

2007-10-02T18:26:00.000+08:00

I'm gonna be really angry Myyannnmar!

Haha.... Some stuff from th Mr Brown Show...

An Inconvenient Truth

2007-10-02T01:19:00.000+08:00

No, it's not Al Gore's movie that I'm referring to.
It's realising that overdue school fee payments would have to be made at the Student Services Center. That's like at a super secluded corner of school. Plus, I had to wait for half an hour just to make payment.
Really inconvenient.

Argh! One more presentation and another mid term to wrap the week up. Hope they pass swiftly and smoothly.

Is Microsoft Squeezing Your Balls?

2007-09-30T12:53:00.001+08:00

I'm super pissed off at Microsoft. In an effort to push consumers to buy their freaking Office 07, they've changed the default file format for Word documents. Yes, because of that, poor users of Office XP (me!) will be unable to open files in docx format. Hence, I'll have to send a reply to the sender asking him/her to save it in a doc format which is a super obscure function in Office 07.

I've sent "I'm sorry, unable to open your files cos I'm using an older version of Office" a gazillion times to others. Not only does it make work an inconvenience, it makes you look like a loser for not having the latest software.

Isn't that Microsoft tightening their vice like grip on your balls, demanding that you buy their new but horrendous, user-unfriendly software? It's not like I've got other options. Stuff like open office sucks shit because it functions like bloody Office 95.

Argh! Fucking pissed off!

Coming to You @ Madame Tussauds

2007-09-29T15:45:00.000+08:00

Clarence Koh in a suit. Known for.... reasons unknown.
Aiya, it's my pageant photo lahhh!
Don't I look suave?
I think the shiny balls look better.
Thanks Ahmad, for the photo.

[C]offin [P]rovision [F]und

2007-09-28T13:28:00.001+08:00

You know that in Singapore, we are made to save for our own funeral expenses? Especially our coffins!
Thanks to the CPF, we are now able to save for our own future. (when we retire at 60+++) (!!!)
So we shall spend like $400k on our lavish funerals? What should I have? An emerald-jade coffin adorned with gold and platinum? a 20-course feast for guests? A 1ha burial site? What else can I spend on for my funeral with that sub-million that I'll save?

La la la la~ Can't touch this! Mr Brown puts it most aptly!

update

2007-09-28T01:04:00.000+08:00

After two days of hard work plus one night of partying, my interest in preparing for my mid-terms seems to have weaned.

The progress made: 1 term paper, 1/4 of my speech, 1/2 of my math.
What else needs to be done: 3/4 of my speech, 1/2 my math, and German!

Loads more in this many days. How am I going to survive? Last burst of energy? Seriously man, apathy is taking over.

Anyhow, I was at my school's D&D last night. It was held at the Retro Room in MOS. The turnout was so-so but the food was rather good. Hmmm... I'll need to find all those peeps who owe me my pictures!

Hmmm, yeah. I've lost that reflective mood now. Promise to blog more when I get half my brain back.

Checklist

2007-09-26T02:40:00.000+08:00

So, 2 of 5 recess week days are over. What's accomplished? Only my term paper.

The funniest thing, due date: 15 Oct.
I have two mid terms and one assessed speech next week.
Yes, I've completed the least of my priorities!

So it's CS D&D tomorrow evening. Wonder how everything will pan out...

Term Papyrus

2007-09-25T14:25:00.000+08:00

I'm taking this recess to work on my term paper on the difficulties faced by journalists. It is a rather broad topic and I have around 1000 words to spare. The thing is I'm stuck at 900 words. I am at a bloody loss for points on the political pressures a journalist would face. Well, I tried quoting the law and realised that th Newspaper & Printing Presses Act together with the Undesirable Publications Act say nothing about journalistic opinions against government practices. But we all do know that publications commenting on government policies will be axed. So where do you find the law that allows the judiciary to chop them activist reporters? Look at the Sedition Act. Shit. It took me over an hour to source out that crap and now I'm too tired to write.

I'll be meeting my German tutorial mate for practice sessions later. I hope things go smoothly well so that I can head back to home sweet home earlier. They say that hall should be a home away from home. It really is bullshit for there really is no place like home; an air-conditioned, dust-free environment where I can rest my mind and worry about jack squat.

Alright I do have a persuasive speech and two mid-terms to work on. Sigh. Restful recess? Fuck that concept. I guess it's just time allowed for catching up on our studies.

And, yes, pageant's tomorrow. CS D&D rather. Time to squandered on frivolous activities. Sigh.